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Entry tags:
GB: Senses
Fandom: GetBackers
Pairing: Juubei/Kazuki
Warnings: None
Rating: PG
Summary: He once knew Kazuki intimately.
He once knew Kazuki intimately: sight and sound, touch and smell and taste. He knew where to kiss, where to bite; he had a map of Kazuki in his head. Now he fumbles, learning Kazuki's body all over again -- sharper, now, harder. He wishes he could see, see him fighting, see him when they're in bed together, see the way he looks tousled and sleepy on a morning. But now all he has is sound, touch, taste, smell. It's no substitute, somehow, although those senses have sharpened, so that he can tell Kazuki by his tread, locate him by the faintest stirring of his bells. Right now, Kazuki is in the same room -- a few meters away, perhaps, but close.
Kazuki's hand cups his cheek, warm, the pads of his fingers roughened more by the handling of his strings than they had been the last time they touched like this. Juubei tries not to jump at the sudden touch: Kazuki had been closer than he thought. "Are you alright?" Kazuki asks, softly. Juubei can almost remember the expression that would be on Kazuki's face right now.
"I'm... regretting."
"Your eyes?"
Juubei nods the slightest bit. Kazuki breathes out a sigh, moves his fingers up to pull away his visor and brush his fingertips over Juubei's closed eyelids. That gesture somehow feels more intimate than anything else, now. Juubei shivers.
"If I could give you my own eyes, I would," Kazuki says, and he moves closer. Juubei feels his breath against his face first, so he isn't startled when Kazuki's lips press against his. Kisses are at least familiar: he always had his eyes closed for these, in his folly of not knowing what things he might one day long to see.
"I don't want your eyes," he says, against Kazuki's mouth. "I want to see you with my own, and I want you to see me."
He can feel Kazuki's smile, faint, sad at the edges. "The last part, at least, you can have."
"If you're feeling guilty, don't. This is my own fault."
"If I'd been better to you -- "
"Kazuki," Juubei says -- just that, and no more, but the weight of love in it silences Kazuki. He rests their foreheads together, sighing, runs his fingers through Juubei's hair. A moment later he's straightening, and Juubei hears the smile this time, in his voice.
"You're amazing, Juubei."
"Kazuki -- "
"No, listen to me." Kazuki takes his hand, squeezing gently. "I know you think it was your destiny, but... you didn't have to follow me. You didn't have to come into the Limitless Fortress with me, and you didn't have to wait for me when I left, or forgive me when I came back. You didn't have to... I'm not sure I deserve this. Even now -- you don't care that this is partly my fault, you just... live with it. I swear that if I didn't bring it up, you'd pretend it was no trouble. So... as you've served me, I want to serve you."
"Kazuki!"
"I'll be your eyes," Kazuki says, trailing his fingers up over Juubei's forearms. "I'll do whatever you want, at least while we're in this room. Let me do this much. I don't care what the tradition is. Tradition died in flames, remember?"
"Oh, Kazuki," Juubei says, because there's nothing else he can say, except, maybe -- "Yes, alright. If you want."
"It's not a question of what I want," Kazuki says, laughing. "For once, Juubei, it's what you want."
Juubei takes a deep breath. "I want to touch you. Just... to touch you. So I can learn..."
"I understand," Kazuki says. His clothing rustles as he stands; his bells chime softly. Juubei hears him take a step back from the bed, guesses from the noise that he's pulling his shirt off. Then he steps closer again, takes Juubei's hands and guides them up to his face. Juubei cups Kazuki's face, feeling as if he can't breathe. He sits up on his knees and kisses Kazuki -- softly, to begin with. His fingers trace the lines of Kazuki's face: the arch of his eyebrows, the sharpness of his cheekbones. As he trails his fingers lower, over Kazuki's throat, tracing his adam's apple and his collarbone, Kazuki takes a soft breath. He kisses him again, now, deeper and wetter, but still slow, taking his time.
"Kazuki..."
"Anything you want," Kazuki reminds him, quietly. Juubei takes a deep breath.
"Finish taking your clothes off and get onto the bed with me?"
"Just a second, then," Kazuki says, easily, and he gets up. Juubei moves further onto the bed, trying to imagine how Kazuki looks right now -- does he still blush when he strips? Do his eyes hold the same old tenderness? Or is that tempered now by time and sorrow and life?
The bed dips as Kazuki moves onto it. "I'm here," he says, quietly. He takes Juubei's hands in his, guides them to his body again. "What do you want to do, Juubei?"
"I just want to touch you," he says, and he gently takes Kazuki by the shoulders and pushes him down. He leans down, then, traces Kazuki's collarbone with kisses, with his tongue.
"Anything you want, remember," Kazuki says, touching him gently, sliding his fingers into his hair. "Anything."
"Yes," Juubei says, trailing kisses lower. "Thank you."
There's a smile in Kazuki's voice again. "You're welcome," he says, and then he gasps at Juubei's touch, and doesn't speak again.
Pairing: Juubei/Kazuki
Warnings: None
Rating: PG
Summary: He once knew Kazuki intimately.
He once knew Kazuki intimately: sight and sound, touch and smell and taste. He knew where to kiss, where to bite; he had a map of Kazuki in his head. Now he fumbles, learning Kazuki's body all over again -- sharper, now, harder. He wishes he could see, see him fighting, see him when they're in bed together, see the way he looks tousled and sleepy on a morning. But now all he has is sound, touch, taste, smell. It's no substitute, somehow, although those senses have sharpened, so that he can tell Kazuki by his tread, locate him by the faintest stirring of his bells. Right now, Kazuki is in the same room -- a few meters away, perhaps, but close.
Kazuki's hand cups his cheek, warm, the pads of his fingers roughened more by the handling of his strings than they had been the last time they touched like this. Juubei tries not to jump at the sudden touch: Kazuki had been closer than he thought. "Are you alright?" Kazuki asks, softly. Juubei can almost remember the expression that would be on Kazuki's face right now.
"I'm... regretting."
"Your eyes?"
Juubei nods the slightest bit. Kazuki breathes out a sigh, moves his fingers up to pull away his visor and brush his fingertips over Juubei's closed eyelids. That gesture somehow feels more intimate than anything else, now. Juubei shivers.
"If I could give you my own eyes, I would," Kazuki says, and he moves closer. Juubei feels his breath against his face first, so he isn't startled when Kazuki's lips press against his. Kisses are at least familiar: he always had his eyes closed for these, in his folly of not knowing what things he might one day long to see.
"I don't want your eyes," he says, against Kazuki's mouth. "I want to see you with my own, and I want you to see me."
He can feel Kazuki's smile, faint, sad at the edges. "The last part, at least, you can have."
"If you're feeling guilty, don't. This is my own fault."
"If I'd been better to you -- "
"Kazuki," Juubei says -- just that, and no more, but the weight of love in it silences Kazuki. He rests their foreheads together, sighing, runs his fingers through Juubei's hair. A moment later he's straightening, and Juubei hears the smile this time, in his voice.
"You're amazing, Juubei."
"Kazuki -- "
"No, listen to me." Kazuki takes his hand, squeezing gently. "I know you think it was your destiny, but... you didn't have to follow me. You didn't have to come into the Limitless Fortress with me, and you didn't have to wait for me when I left, or forgive me when I came back. You didn't have to... I'm not sure I deserve this. Even now -- you don't care that this is partly my fault, you just... live with it. I swear that if I didn't bring it up, you'd pretend it was no trouble. So... as you've served me, I want to serve you."
"Kazuki!"
"I'll be your eyes," Kazuki says, trailing his fingers up over Juubei's forearms. "I'll do whatever you want, at least while we're in this room. Let me do this much. I don't care what the tradition is. Tradition died in flames, remember?"
"Oh, Kazuki," Juubei says, because there's nothing else he can say, except, maybe -- "Yes, alright. If you want."
"It's not a question of what I want," Kazuki says, laughing. "For once, Juubei, it's what you want."
Juubei takes a deep breath. "I want to touch you. Just... to touch you. So I can learn..."
"I understand," Kazuki says. His clothing rustles as he stands; his bells chime softly. Juubei hears him take a step back from the bed, guesses from the noise that he's pulling his shirt off. Then he steps closer again, takes Juubei's hands and guides them up to his face. Juubei cups Kazuki's face, feeling as if he can't breathe. He sits up on his knees and kisses Kazuki -- softly, to begin with. His fingers trace the lines of Kazuki's face: the arch of his eyebrows, the sharpness of his cheekbones. As he trails his fingers lower, over Kazuki's throat, tracing his adam's apple and his collarbone, Kazuki takes a soft breath. He kisses him again, now, deeper and wetter, but still slow, taking his time.
"Kazuki..."
"Anything you want," Kazuki reminds him, quietly. Juubei takes a deep breath.
"Finish taking your clothes off and get onto the bed with me?"
"Just a second, then," Kazuki says, easily, and he gets up. Juubei moves further onto the bed, trying to imagine how Kazuki looks right now -- does he still blush when he strips? Do his eyes hold the same old tenderness? Or is that tempered now by time and sorrow and life?
The bed dips as Kazuki moves onto it. "I'm here," he says, quietly. He takes Juubei's hands in his, guides them to his body again. "What do you want to do, Juubei?"
"I just want to touch you," he says, and he gently takes Kazuki by the shoulders and pushes him down. He leans down, then, traces Kazuki's collarbone with kisses, with his tongue.
"Anything you want, remember," Kazuki says, touching him gently, sliding his fingers into his hair. "Anything."
"Yes," Juubei says, trailing kisses lower. "Thank you."
There's a smile in Kazuki's voice again. "You're welcome," he says, and then he gasps at Juubei's touch, and doesn't speak again.